What Is The Ruling On Istikhara For Marriage?

Etiquette and Method of Istikhara with the Quran

In some aspects of life, people experience doubt and confusion about their decisions, and sometimes even consulting knowledgeable individuals does not resolve their uncertainty. In such situations, Istikhara becomes necessary so that people can be freed from this confusion.

Istikhara means seeking goodness and blessing from God. Believers turn to Istikhara when they hesitate and ponder over a matter and are unsure about the rightness or benefit of their decision.

Marriage is one of the very important stages in all our lives. Usually, we face difficulties and hesitation in choosing a partner. This is when we turn to Istikhara, questioning whether Istikhara for marriage is permissible or not. Istikhara is not a new topic, but it is always relevant. Therefore, in this article, we aim to answer this question with the help of scholars.

One of the solutions offered by religious teachings to rescue a person from doubt and hesitation is “Istikhara.” In this sense, Istikhara is a practice a person resorts to when he or she is unsure about doing or refraining from something and cannot decide by any means. Essentially, it means asking God for goodness regarding that specific matter. Istikhara gains significance only after research and consultation have been done.

Scholars' Opinions on Istikhara for Marriage

• It is necessary to consider and think carefully about your affairs and try to find a suitable solution through reflection. But if you do not reach a conclusion, consult others to remove your confusion. If consulting experts does not help and your confusion remains, then it is time for Istikhara. In any case, there is no religious obligation to act upon the result of Istikhara, but it is better not to act contrary to it.

• Young people's lives are full of ups and downs, and sensitive and important decisions arise often, especially for the youth. Therefore, parents and experienced elders from among relatives guide the young, considering their best interests. Consulting wise and experienced people is a wise approach that can help guide one through life’s difficulties.

• Ayatollah Khamenei (may his shadow endure): Try to reflect and think carefully before doing anything and find a proper solution. If you don’t reach a conclusion, consult others to remove confusion. If consultation with experts also does not resolve your confusion, then turn to Istikhara. There is no religious obligation to act upon Istikhara, but it is better not to oppose it.

• Ayatollah Sistani (may his shadow endure): There is no objection and it is not obligatory; acting upon it is also not obligatory.

• Ayatollah Makarem Shirazi (may his shadow endure): Istikhara is a kind of consultation with God, meaning if a person hesitates about doing or not doing something, they first think thoroughly. If they reach a conclusion, they act accordingly; if not, they consult experienced and knowledgeable people. If still unresolved, they consult God through Istikhara and act accordingly. Acting upon Istikhara is not obligatory but it is better not to oppose it unless it causes a considerable delay.

• Ayatollah Alavi Gorgani (may his shadow endure): For marriage and similar matters, Istikhara is allowed if consultation and research have been done and doubt remains. In that case, Istikhara is permissible and acting upon it is an ethical duty. If someone does not act and suffers harm, they themselves are at fault. However, intentional disrespect or neglect of Istikhara is sinful.

• Ayatollah Shahroudi (may his shadow endure): Istikhara can be done for marriage, and detailed procedures are mentioned in specialized books. Opposing Istikhara may lead to regret.

Opinions on Remote (Phone/Online) Istikhara for Marriage

Today, thanks to computers and the internet, one can access many software and websites anywhere and perform Istikhara about important matters with just a few clicks. We intend to present the opinions of the great religious authorities on this matter.

• Ayatollah Nouri Hamedani (may his shadow endure): If the person doing Istikhara uses the Quran or prayer beads (tasbih) for the Istikhara, it is reliable. Random or pre-written/spoken responses are not valid. The person performing Istikhara must do it specifically for the requester using tasbih or Quran; the results should not be pre-existing.

• Ayatollah Makarem Shirazi (may his shadow endure): Both the Istikhara and the person performing it must meet necessary conditions.

• Ayatollah Wahid Khorasani (may his shadow endure): The person performing Istikhara is not ineffective; their state, such as being in ablution, facing the Qibla, and sincerity, is important. Some may receive divine insights from the verses that others cannot. It cannot be said that Istikhara performed without any information about the person is valid.

Should We Perform Istikhara for Marriage?

One of the ways that religious teachings offer to save a person from doubt, hesitation, and confusion is “Istikhara.”

Istikhara is an act a person resorts to when unsure about doing or refraining from something and cannot choose at all. It essentially means seeking goodness from God regarding that specific matter. Istikhara becomes meaningful only after research and consultation.