SAEDNEWS: To capture someone’s heart, show that you have no intention of changing them. Always be the person you truly are, and don’t be afraid to express your genuine self.
According to the Family Magazine section of Saed News, it is true that today, more than ever, men show little urgency to commit to long-term relationships. When asked about the reasons behind this hesitation, men usually cite several different factors for their lack of readiness for marriage.
Overall, there are four main factors that strongly influence modern men’s reluctance to commit to long-term marriage:
1. Fear of Not Choosing the Best Option
Men tend to agree to marriage only when they are confident they have chosen the best possible partner. A small number of men are constantly preoccupied with the thought that a “better” woman might appear in their lives. This raises an important question: how can men be encouraged to commit to a long-term, meaningful relationship?
2. Fear of Failure and Its Consequences
Men are afraid of the potential outcomes of an unsuccessful relationship. The emotional pain caused by separation can be devastating and unbearable for them. At the same time, many men are deeply concerned about the financial risks they may face in the event of separation or divorce.
3. Resistance to Major Life Changes
It is in men’s nature to postpone anything that brings serious and fundamental change to their lives. Marriage, to some extent, marks the beginning of complications in a man’s life. Whether modern men believe this or not, many are unwilling to leave their comfort zone and enter a life filled with responsibility, compromise, and self-sacrifice.
4. Reduced Social Pressure to Marry
Men today face far less social pressure to get married. As a result, one of the traditional motivations for marriage has effectively been removed.
1. Show That You Are Independent
Men dislike women who lean back and wait for a man to take control of every aspect of their lives. Show that while you welcome his ideas, you are capable of managing your own affairs. If you plan to buy a home, do not postpone it until after marriage, as this may make him think you lack independence.
2. Show Kindness and Warmth
This may sound surprising, but men need a woman who is loving and lovable. Just as independence empowers women, an inability to adapt and connect emotionally can discourage men.
3. Be Certain of Your Feelings and Your Choice
Make sure—rationally and consciously—that you truly love the man you have chosen and want to spend your life with him. Until you are fully convinced that you are compatible, thoughts of commitment and marriage should not arise. You should know him well enough to determine whether he is capable of commitment, possesses the qualities you seek, earns your respect and admiration, has proven his loyalty, honesty, and integrity, and genuinely loves you.
4. Take Care of Your Appearance
This does not mean dressing or behaving like a model, but it does mean paying reasonable attention to how you look. Wear clothes that suit you and highlight your best qualities. Carry yourself with confidence.
5. Do Not Appear Rushed to Marry
You may feel that he has already taken a long time to decide, but stay calm. This can actually be a positive sign, as it may indicate that he wants to make a thoughtful and sound decision.
6. Be Yourself and Don’t Hide Your True Nature
This may be the most important quality men look for in women. Surveys show that 99 percent of men say that women whose personalities change after marriage are a leading cause of post-marital separation. Constantly suppressing your opinions, forcing agreement, or pretending to laugh at jokes you find unfunny will never lead to lasting success. Be your authentic self. Men often test women in this regard, and those who seem emotionally distant or inauthentic are perceived as incapable of love. Just as women must show independence, they must also demonstrate a genuine capacity to share love.
7. Show That You Truly Care About Him
Love him for who he is, not for what he can provide. Many men say that before marriage, the most important thing to them is knowing that a woman loves them for their true selves—not as a means to an end. No man wants to feel chosen merely because he is a good provider, a respectable citizen, or a potential father. While these traits matter, a man feels happiest when he realizes he has been chosen because he is a best friend. Show interest in his life, values, and passions. Talk about his work, but focus more on its meaning and personal growth than on income or financial benefits. Praise his moral character and positive traits.
8. Don’t Play Games to Attract Him
Men are well aware of the games some women play to gain attention. Even if a man is temporarily drawn in, he will never truly commit. Some believe that talking to others to provoke jealousy may work briefly, but how can trust develop if he sees you as manipulative? Even strong attraction fades when trust and honesty are in doubt.
9. Show That You Don’t Intend to Change Him
If a man feels that commitment and marriage will fundamentally alter his lifestyle, he will strongly resist committing—even if he is in love. Show that you are capable of compromise. Let him know you are comfortable with him spending an evening watching football with friends without you. Don’t make him feel that he must enjoy every free moment now because his life will change after marriage. Avoid appearing impatient. Continue living your normal daily life with ease. Never suggest meeting parents unless he initiates it. It is best to allow him to make these decisions himself. Remember, your goal is to provide the information he needs to decide—while also giving him the time and space required to do so.
