Is it forbidden to shake hands with an underage girl? The clear ruling most people need

Tuesday, August 26, 2025

Most jurists rule that shaking hands with an underage girl is not permissible — the ruling is rooted in preserving modesty and preventing fitna, though a few authorities allow narrow exceptions.

Is it forbidden to shake hands with an underage girl? The clear ruling most people need

Shaking hands with an underage girl is not permitted in Islam. This ruling is based on Islam’s general principles of preserving dignity and modesty, especially regarding women.

In what situations is handshaking with a non-mahram permitted?

According to the fatwas of all maraji‘ (sources of emulation) — except Ayatollahs Tabrizi, Sistani and Makarem Shirazi — if minors understand good and bad, shaking hands with them is not permitted.

Ayatollahs Tabrizi and Sistani: If the act is without intent of pleasure and there is no fear of falling into sin, it is not problematic.

Ayatollah Makarem Shirazi: If they understand right and wrong, then out of precaution handshaking is not permitted.

Reasons for this ruling

  • Preserving chastity and modesty: Shaking hands with non-mahram persons, especially children and adolescents, can open the way to improper thoughts or feelings.

  • Preventing fitna: Such contact may create suspicion or fitna within the community.

  • Emphasis on guarding personal boundaries: The body — particularly women’s bodies — is to be treated as private and not casually touched.

The ruling about handshaking with non-mahram persons

The article cites Quranic guidance supporting modest behaviour and guarding chastity in social interactions. Verses referenced include instructions to believing women and men to lower their gaze and protect their private parts, and admonitions against speech or behaviour that might tempt those with wrongful intent.

Quranic excerpts paraphrased:

  • Tell the believing women to lower their gaze and guard their private parts and not display adornment except what is apparent.

  • Tell the believing men to lower their gaze and guard their chastity.

  • Do not speak in a coquettish way that tempts those with a sickness in their hearts.

Important points

  • Age distinction: The prohibition applies regardless of the precise numerical age — it concerns all girls who are considered minors in this context.

  • Intention matters: A person’s intent in offering a handshake is relevant; even absent bad intent, many jurists still rule against the practice.

  • Consult your marja‘ in special cases: For specific situations or cultural contexts, seeking guidance from a religious authority is recommended.

Conclusion: Shaking hands with an underage girl is generally considered forbidden in Islam and should be avoided; for detailed or exceptional cases, consult a qualified religious authority.


6) Practical Tips

Tip

Prefer non-contact greetings

Use a verbal greeting or a nod instead of a handshake when interacting with minor girls.

Consider the child’s awareness

Some jurists allow contact when the child clearly lacks sexual awareness and there is no risk.

Mind your intention

Even if you mean no harm, many scholars advise avoiding handshakes to prevent misunderstanding.

Follow your marja‘ for edge cases

For specific or culturally sensitive situations, ask your chosen religious authority.

Respect public modesty norms

Avoid actions that could cause suspicion or appear to undermine community standards of modesty.



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