SAEDNEWS: Showing love and affection to your spouse can make married life sweeter and stronger. Expressions of love should continue throughout the marriage, just as they were in the early days, to prevent the relationship from becoming cold or lifeless.
When you express love to someone and say “I love you,” the worst possible mistake is to expect them to say it back immediately or to treat it as a special favor they now owe you. Some people simply do not have the skills needed to express affection, and for them showing emotions is always difficult.
For a marriage to last, the most important and fundamental factor is love between partners — but love itself also needs to be expressed in order to survive. Unfortunately, for many couples, expressing love is not easy.
There are many reasons why spouses may struggle to show love. Below, we explore some of the most common reasons and then offer practical ways to express love for those who find it difficult.
One of the most common reasons people fail to express love is that they simply have not learned how to express their emotions properly.
Some deeply rooted cultural or personal beliefs prevent people from showing love.
Some beliefs come from society, such as the idea that if a man shows affection, his spouse might later take advantage of him.
Other beliefs come from childhood experiences — for example, someone who was emotionally neglected or rejected by their parents may avoid expressing feelings in adulthood in order to protect themselves from being hurt again.
Some people stop expressing love because their partner has discouraged them. Perhaps they expressed affection before but were met with indifference or negativity. Over time, this causes their emotional expression to fade until they stop showing affection altogether.
For some people, love is expressed through behavior rather than words. They believe their partner should understand their feelings through what they do, not what they say.
If you find it hard to say emotional or loving phrases, these strategies can help:
Let your partner know that you are trying to change and improve in this area. This helps them support you instead of accidentally discouraging you, which could weaken your motivation.
Begin with small steps, such as looking at old photos together and talking about how you felt when those moments were captured. Then talk about how you feel now about your relationship and your life together.
Discover how your partner prefers to receive love. Do they like verbal affection? Physical touch? Seeing love through actions? Once you understand their emotional language, expressing love becomes easier.
If you lack confidence in expressing love and want to change, you will need strong determination and consistency. You may seek help from a counselor or write down your commitment and keep it with you as a reminder.
Physical touch, such as holding hands or gentle affection, can be a powerful way to express love — even if it does not come naturally to you.
Work on matching your facial expressions and body language with what you say. If your partner senses a contradiction between your words and your behavior, the message of love will lose its impact.
Love does not survive on feeling alone — it needs expression, effort, and emotional awareness. Learning to express love is not about changing who you are, but about learning how to let your feelings be seen.
