Saed News: Children's quietness can have specific causes, or it may not be a cause for concern. When should we be worried about a child's quiet nature? In this article from Danzi, we will discuss another concern of parents.
According to the Saed News Family Magazine Service, if you are worried about this issue, it is best to consult an experienced child psychologist for guidance. This article aims to provide more insight into this issue.
If you are dealing with overly talkative children, there is already an article on this topic in Danzi magazine that you may find useful.
Signs of Children's Quietness
Has your child's teacher reported that they do not speak comfortably in school? Is your child quiet at home but suddenly starts talking when taken to a party or class?
If your child behaves completely differently at home compared to social settings, they may have Selective Mutism. This condition is often mistaken for general quietness in children, but distinguishing between the two is essential for proper treatment and achieving the best outcomes.
Some children who are labeled as shy or quiet due to their lack of speech may actually be experiencing Selective Mutism.
Selective Mutism is a rare behavioral trait among children. However, research, particularly during the COVID-19 pandemic, showed that many children preferred remaining silent rather than speaking. While a child with Selective Mutism may appear shy, the root cause is actually anxiety and fear of speaking in public.
Shy children may not volunteer to read aloud in class, but if required, they can do so. They are still able to perform daily school tasks. However, children with Selective Mutism may struggle to carry out even their routine tasks.
Although Selective Mutism has distinct symptoms, parents should avoid labeling their children, as this can create stress and anxiety at home. Diagnosing whether a child is shy or has Selective Mutism should be left to a skilled team of psychologists. Without consulting a professional, parents cannot accurately determine whether their child has a problem or not.
Causes of Children's Quietness
The most important step in helping quiet children is understanding their emotions. Some children remain silent because they are in a new environment without their parents. However, such children may quickly regain confidence and start communicating with others, including adults.
On the other hand, many quiet children are unsure about what to do, how to behave, and how to communicate with others. When away from their parents, they may not know how to talk to adults or other children.
At first, quiet children may become highly sensitive to the noise, speed, and activities of other kids, making it difficult for them to find someone to talk to. This can lead to feelings of sadness. One major challenge for quiet children is that they do not know how to use speech to gain adult attention.
Some possible reasons for children's quietness include:
1. Selective Mutism
Using the term Selective Mutism suggests that the child is choosing to be silent. However, the reality is that children do not consciously choose silence; rather, their silence is an involuntary response to certain situations. Children experiencing anxiety often prefer silence over speaking.
Today, Selective Mutism is more commonly seen in children who fear speaking due to being separated from their parents. These children believe they are unable to speak in certain situations, even though they may confidently communicate with familiar adults at home.
Children with Selective Mutism are extremely anxious about speaking in front of others. Their fear is so overwhelming that it prevents them from speaking in some situations. In extreme cases, their anxiety may even cause them to freeze up entirely, unable to move or react. This intense anxiety requires multiple sessions with a psychologist to diagnose and treat.
2. Shyness
Many quiet children are simply shy. Shy children often feel uncomfortable in new situations, especially when surrounded by unfamiliar adults and children.
However, if given opportunities to experience new environments and interact with new people, shy children can gradually adapt and start communicating.
Shy children are more concerned about making mistakes compared to confident children. They fear that others—both children and adults—might judge what they say or do.
Interestingly, children with Selective Mutism can gain confidence when supported and encouraged by shy children to speak.
3. Learning Additional Languages
Children learning a new language often go through a silent period. This is not a problem but rather an active phase in language acquisition. During this time, children process and understand familiar or new words before they start speaking.
Such children may transition from being talkative and confident speakers to being quiet and reserved. This happens because they are unsure how to communicate with other children in the new language, leading to anxiety about speaking.
In any case, parents should avoid labeling their child or creating anxiety at home. The proper diagnosis of the cause of quietness should be determined by a skilled team of psychologists.
What Does Children's Quietness Indicate?
Children’s quietness can sometimes be a sign of underlying issues. Therefore, it is crucial for parents to educate themselves using reliable sources and seek professional evaluation if needed.
Some possible indicators of a quiet child include:
Social anxiety
Autism
Shyness
Distress
Introversion
These are all possible hypotheses, but no definitive conclusion can be made without professional evaluation. Parents should always consult an experienced child psychologist to avoid misdiagnosis.
Should Parents Be Worried About Their Child's Quietness?
Some parents may worry that their child is behind their peers in speech development. This concern can be overwhelming, leading to anxiety and even sleepless nights. Parents may compare their child's speech development to their other children, increasing their worry. If this concern is not managed, it may turn into panic and result in inappropriate parental reactions.
Most children develop speech at their own pace, meaning some start talking earlier or later than others. However, in specific cases, a team of psychologists should carefully assess and evaluate the child's quietness.
Ways to Treat Children's Quietness
While quiet children have certain advantages, parents should not allow the negative aspects of quietness to affect their child's well-being. Quiet children may struggle with low self-esteem and excessive fear.
Here are some ways parents can help:
1. Address Low Self-Esteem
Introverted and quiet children often have low self-esteem due to fewer friendships, excessive inner worries, and a passive personality.
Parents can build their child’s self-confidence by involving them in small tasks, such as setting the table or folding clothes. Praising the child’s efforts will help them feel accomplished and encourage them to take on more challenges, gradually increasing their confidence.
Additionally, enrolling children in art or music classes can help boost their confidence.
2. Provide More Social Opportunities
Parents should create more opportunities for their children to interact socially. For example, taking them shopping and encouraging them to make their own purchases can improve their communication skills.
If a child fears talking to others, parents can start with phone conversations, allowing them to answer calls and gradually build confidence.
Encouraging children to help serve guests at home can also improve their social interaction. However, they should never be forced into social situations.
3. Create a Warm Home Environment
Children thrive in a positive home environment. Unfortunately, research shows that children from households with frequent conflicts often become quiet, fearful, and withdrawn. Parents should work on improving family harmony alongside helping their children.
Spending time together outdoors and engaging in enjoyable activities can help children feel more secure and expressive.
Final Thoughts
Children’s quietness is a double-edged sword with both advantages and disadvantages. However, with proper education and encouragement, parents can help their children become more communicative.
What are your thoughts on children's quietness? Have you had any experiences or solutions for this issue? Share your insights in the comments section.
