How Do Iranians Get Married? 7 Surprising Facts About Weddings

According to SAEDNEWS, A traditional Persian wedding is a dazzling affair filled with joy, music, and vibrant customs that celebrate love and union. These weddings are not just a simple ceremony; they often involve families coming together for an elaborate celebration that can last for days. In this blog post, we will delve deeper into seven surprising facts and traditions that make Persian weddings so unique and memorable.

1. Khastegari: The Proposal Ceremony

The journey to a Persian wedding begins with the Khastegari ceremony, which is akin to a proposal meeting where the groom and his family visit the bride’s home to formally ask for her hand in marriage. This important first step is rich in tradition.

In the past, the groom’s family would carefully search for a suitable bride, considering various factors like family reputation and social standings. Historically, this meeting served as a chance for both families to interact and get to know one another, offering a platform for the couple to begin their relationship. Nowadays, especially in larger cities, this ceremony is often more symbolic, as many couples already know each other well before this formal introduction.

During Khastegari, the suitor brings gifts like flowers and sweets for the bride and her family. Traditionally, the bride serves tea to the guests, which allows her and the groom to spend some private time together, getting to know one another more intimately. Elders from both families are typically invited, as their wisdom and experience hold great value in such gatherings. After the ceremony, the groom’s family will typically call the bride’s family the following day to learn whether she will accept their son as her husband. If she agrees, preparations move forward to the next exciting step: Baleh Boroon.

2. Baleh Boroon: Official Engagement

Following Khastegari, the Baleh Boroon ceremony takes place. This is a significant moment when the groom’s family visits the bride’s home again to present her with a bouquet of flowers, sweets, and usually a piece of gold, like a necklace or ring, known as Neshan. This gesture signifies the official engagement of the couple.

During this visit, the families discuss various traditions, including the topic of Mehrieh, which refers to the gift of love that the groom is required to provide the bride. Nevertheless, it remains a traditional cornerstone in many Persian weddings. After finalizing the engagement details, families set a date for the upcoming engagement party.

3. Engagement Party: Celebrating Announcements

The engagement party is an opportunity for the couple to announce their commitment to the world. The bride’s family typically hosts this celebration, which can be a grand affair. Families often prepare traditional meals and provide entertainment in the form of music and dancing, filling the space with joyful energy.

In many cases, this event allows families to share their happiness while they engage in light-hearted introductions and conversations. As couples are often already familiar with each other, this gathering serves more as a celebratory acknowledgment of their love and a chance to solidify family connections. In some cultures, exchanging rings is a common practice during this ceremony, while in others, it is customary for only the groom’s family to present jewelry to the bride.

4. Aghd: Signing the Marriage Contract

The Aghd is perhaps the most critical part of a Persian wedding, where the couple signs a legal and religious marriage contract. Regardless of their religious beliefs, Iranian couples typically observe a beautiful set of traditions during the Aghd ceremony.

An elaborate table, known as Sofreh Aghd, is beautifully decorated with several symbolic items that have deep meanings. Commonly included are various types of nuts like almonds, hazelnuts, walnuts, and pistachios, symbolizing prosperity and wealth for the couple’s shared future. A mirror and two candlesticks are also included, symbolizing brightness and illuminating the couple's path. When placing colored eggs on the spread, family and guests impart their wishes for fertility and children.

The couple will also dip their little fingers into cups of honey and yogurt, symbolizing the sweet and sour moments of life, and feed it to each other — a lovely gesture reflecting their commitment to care for one another during all circumstances. As the marriage officiant conducts the ceremony, it is traditional for two unmarried girls to hold a silk scarf over the couple’s heads, while a married woman grinds two sugar cones together above them, representing happiness and joy in their new life together.

Once the couple exchanges rings and completes the contract, guests express their joy with ululations and heartfelt wishes for a long and happy marriage.

5. Hana Bandan: A Night of Henna

The evening before the wedding is marked by the Hana Bandan ceremony, or the Henna Bridal Party. This cherished tradition involves applying henna, a sacred herb believed to bring good luck and blessings to the couple. The roots of this practice trace back hundreds of years, and today it’s an event filled with excitement and anticipation.

On this special night, the groom’s family arrives at the bride’s home with henna paste, accompanied by music and dance. Typically, an elder family member applies henna on the bride’s palms while they hold hands to wish for a colorful and joyful life together. The ceremony often spills over into an evening of dancing, singing, and gift-giving, with guests giving money to the couple as a present, a tradition known as "Shabash."

This celebration of henna enhances the couple’s bond and sends them off to their wedding with an air of festivity and joy.

6. The Wedding Party: A Festive Celebration

The day of the wedding, commonly referred to as Aroosi, is perhaps the busiest and most exciting day for both families. The bride typically starts her day early at a beauty salon, getting ready for her big moment, while the groom prepares himself and decorates his car with flowers.

Upon arrival at the wedding venue—be it a traditional home, a garden, or a banquet hall—the couple is greeted with clapping and ululations by their guests. Festivities continue well into the night, often after midnight, with music, dancing, and feasting. The wedding dinner may feature traditional dishes such as lamb and chicken kebabs served with fragrant rice, although families may choose to serve whatever food resonates with them or reflects their culture.

Photographers capture every special moment, ensuring that the couple has beautiful memories to look back on as they embark on their new life together.

7. Patakhti and Pagosha: Celebratory Gatherings After the Wedding

After the wedding festivities, the celebrations continue with a party known as Patakhti. Held the day after the wedding, this gathering invites friends and family to the groom’s home, where guests present gifts to the newlyweds. In some regions, it is customary to arrange the gathering at the new bride’s home to celebrate her new life.

This event is an opportunity for everyone to socialize, enjoy delicious food, and participate in lively dancing as people come together to celebrate the couple’s union.

Following Patakhti, a more intimate dinner party called Pagosha often takes place. This gathering is typically hosted by close relatives and includes an invitation for the newlyweds to visit their home for the first time since they got married. Guests may bring thoughtful gifts like money, gold coins, or furniture to show their love and support for the couple as they begin their married life.

Persian weddings are more than simply a celebration of love; they embody a tapestry of rich traditions, family bonds, and cultural heritage. Each step, from Khastegari to Pagosha, is filled with meaningful rituals that highlight the values and beliefs held dear by the families involved. From ornate decorations to lively festivities, Persian weddings offer an unforgettable experience for all those who participate. If you ever have the chance to attend a Persian wedding, expect to be swept away by the beauty and heartfelt joy it brings!