How to Respond to Disrespect and Inappropriate Behavior from Your In-Laws

Saturday, March 01, 2025  Read time3 min

Many couples lose their peace of mind due to disrespect from their in-laws. This is where women must learn how to handle such challenges.

How to Respond to Disrespect and Inappropriate Behavior from Your In-Laws

Key Points:

  • Don’t address conflicts directly

  • Show flexibility

  • Change the subject

  • Avoid topics that may cause tension

  • Maintain boundaries

  • Set limits

  • Don’t take things too seriously

  • Consider your spouse’s feelings

  • Don’t seek sympathy from others


According to Saed News, disrespect from in-laws can create significant distress in a marriage. You may have experienced this yourself—being disrespected by your spouse's family for various reasons, which affects your perception of married life and interactions with them.

In such situations, it becomes crucial to determine how to react: Should you stop talking to them? Cut ties? Confront them? Stand your ground no matter what? There are many possible responses, but which one is the wisest?

If you’re feeling distressed by your in-laws' disrespect and are unsure how to handle it, read on for practical advice.

1. Stand United with Your Spouse

Talk to your spouse and calmly express how their family's disrespect affects you. Explain your feelings without criticizing their family.

Your spouse may not fully understand your pain or believe their family is intentionally harming you. However, it’s essential to agree on presenting a united front when interacting with them. Treat your spouse with kindness in front of their family and avoid openly disagreeing with them in family gatherings, as this could create a rift between you that may be difficult to repair.

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2. Don’t Address Conflicts Directly

You’re right—those who disrespect you are in the wrong. However, directly confronting them and defending yourself might offer temporary relief but could escalate tensions even further.

Addressing conflicts head-on often reduces the chances of resolving them in the future. If you value your marriage and want to maintain peace, avoid taking an aggressive stance.

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3. Show Flexibility

When facing disrespect from your in-laws, try not to resist or escalate the conflict. For example, if they criticize your housekeeping or cooking, smile and ask them to share their experiences and tips instead of reacting defensively.

4. Change the Subject

If your in-laws bring up a topic that makes you uncomfortable, subtly change the conversation. Doing so signals that you want to prevent further disrespect and steer the discussion in a more neutral direction.

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5. Avoid Tense Topics

If you suspect that certain discussions may lead to conflict or disrespect, avoid them entirely. Stick to neutral, everyday topics to maintain harmony.

6. Maintain Boundaries

To minimize tensions, create some personal space in family settings. For example, when dining out together, choose a seat further away if necessary. No matter what, remain calm and composed.

7. Set Limits

Discuss boundaries with your spouse and establish clear rules:

  • No one should interfere in your children’s upbringing—you and your spouse alone are responsible for their education and development.

  • If you live near your in-laws, they should notify you before visiting to avoid unannounced intrusions into your private space.

8. Don’t Take Everything Personally

Not every comment from your in-laws is worth getting upset over. Maintain a sense of humor and let minor remarks slide.

9. Consider Your Spouse’s Feelings

Tensions between you and your in-laws affect your spouse emotionally. They may feel torn between their family and their marriage. Never force them to take sides. Instead, show that you respect their family and simply want to be treated with respect in return.

10. Don’t Seek Sympathy from Others

Constantly complaining about your in-laws to others can damage your own marriage. Avoid playing the victim—stay confident, resilient, and find practical solutions to your issues.

Misunderstandings often cause family conflicts. Try to see your in-laws as you would your own family. Ask yourself: Would I be this upset if my own family acted this way? Just as your family raised and cared for you, your in-laws have done the same for your spouse. Treat them as you would your own loved ones.

11. Don’t Retaliate

If your in-laws are rude or disrespectful, don’t stoop to their level. Stay true to your principles and act with dignity. You cannot change them, but you can choose to be patient, kind, and accepting. Responding with grace and self-control will allow you to live without regret or bitterness.

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